Twelve Days of Christmas (continued)

Day 8 (Tuesday): The gift of vision I gave myself. In June I had eye surgery that has left me, for the first time since fourth grade, with better than 20/20 vision. It truly has been life changing!

Day 7 (Wednesday): I climbed Prairie Mountain. Even after an asthma attack mid-climb. And the majority of the group I was climbing with carried on (one stayed back, thank God). And no, I won't ever be hiking with them again!

Day 6 (Thursday): The courage of my convictions. I have an on-going issue with my former employer and while I could  have just walked away, being right, and more importantly, doing the right thing, is more important in this case. Unfortunately, I have to wait until next June (almost two years since the incident) until I (well, my union's lawyers) present the case to an arbitrator.

Day 5 (Friday): I have conquered my sleep demons! Between a CPAP machine and a custom made mouth guard, I sleep again. Twenty years is a long time to function on little to no sleep. While I don't require as many zzzzz's per night as my honey, they are top quality hours of sleep. Quality trumps quantity any time!

Day 4 (Saturday): Rediscovering my yoga practice. Our kula pretty much dissolved when Anusara did, but I've made a committment to my mat and it feels great. Mind, body and soul are relishing it.

And with that, I'm off to practice. I've been sitting at the laptop most of the day (working on a project for a friend to earn some extra holiday cash (yes, I know it's almost Christmas. What can I say, I work best under pressure!)) and my body doth protest! I've got soup simmering (borscht) and cabbage rolls baking, so a tasty dinner will follow.

It's Friday Again...and that's a Good Thing!

Lots going on in my world and I'm busy processing.

Today is my favourite day--Friday morning yoga, tea afterwards (which invariably leads to lunch) & quite possibly drinks with a friend I haven't seen in ages!

And of course, because I could sleep in this morning, I was wide awake at 0530h. Did I mention I went to bed at 0100h? *sigh* Oh well, the sleep I had was restful.

My kitchen looks like a disaster zone and Nermal isn't offering to help tidy it up. I guess that means I'm going to have to. I'll do it tomorrow--it's supposed to be rainy and gross all weekend. Blargh. Good thing I borrowed Season 2 of Numbers from a co-worker! Nothing like veggin' out on the couch all weekend!

Although I'm quite sure that there will be visits to the Farmer's Market(s), coffee, friends and yoga, too.

Happy Friday! Remember: Inhale blessings. Exhale gratitude.

_/|\_

Durga Unveiled

I spent the past weekend in good company. My teacher held a three-day workshop all about Durga.

She's a pretty cool goddess, if you ask me. She rides a lion (the ego), and has many arms (usually 8, but sometimes more. You just never know when an extra arm will come in handy.). In each hand, she carries a weapon that was a gift from the gods. She also carries a conch, which carries the sound of creation, om. She's a warrior (heck, the gods couldn't kill a demon, so they became so enraged that light started emanating from them, and from that light, comes Durga) and never loses her cool. She's also fiercely compassionate. All of the warriors who fought along side her were given the gift of jewellery making.

Our asana practices were pretty kick-asana. There were hip openers (lots of 'em), arm balances (the strength is finally coming in my right side and vasithasana is getting better), backbends (hello, eka pada raja kapotasana I, II, III & IV!), headstand, shoulderstand, heron, sundial, padmasana and yogi dandasana. That's this one:

Mine did not look like that, but it's something to work towards! I'm all bendy and feel every. single. muscle. in. my. body. I LOVE it! Like Nora says, "Well, you know you're alive!"

Other than yoga, I've been getting ready for summer. There's been some cleaning and organizing, preparing my patio (I bought a Campfire in a Can. I can't wait to be warm in the evening!), planting my plants: sweet peas, begonias, and mint. Lots of mint. For lots of mojitos.

Practice, practice, practice. That's my mantra these days and I'm feeling it in my mind, body and spirit. And that's why I do it...

Om shanti shanti shanti

_/|\_

"When you love your work that much-& many teachers do-the only way to get out of trouble is to go deeper in."- Parker Palmer, The Courage to Teach

I love my Monday night class. I teach yoga to in-patients of the Eating Disorders Program at my local hospital. We spent a lot of time talking about the meaning of yoga (both in a big picture and personal way) in my Immersions and Teacher Trainings. Boiled down, this is what resonates with me:

-It's all about service. My job on this great Mother Earth is to serve.

-It's about getting to know yourself better. This is why I come to mat, day after day. Because each day, I learn something new. Sometimes it's profound. Sometimes it's not. And that's ok, as long as I keep learning.

 So, back to Monday nights. It's not about the asana. It's about tapping into that part of yourself that you've always been a little bit afraid of. You're not sure why, but it makes you uncomfortable. And then we just sit and breathe and follow our breath in, then out, connecting with the metronome that's in each one of us. The breath that guides us through our practice--it tells us when we're trying too hard (not breathing) and it tells us when we've got it (we move gracefully on each inhale and exhale and feel the pulsation deep within). The breath that is the greatest meditation teacher.

 Yeah, we move a little bit, but mostly it's about reconnecting with our breath, our bodies and our spirit. About feeling better about ourselves and our place in this world.

 And I do it because I get so much more from their practice than they'll ever know. My heart bursts when I see them relax and let their guards down. When they move their bodies in a way that helps them connect to themselves. And when their bodies, mind and spirit all align, and they know themselves better.

 If I can give them just one or two tools to put in their tool-box for when they leave the hospital, then I've done my job. So that when life gets in their way, they have yoga to turn to to help them through, rather than reverting to old, destructive behaviours.  My job is to serve. And I will gladly continue for as long as they'll let me (although I did win major brownie points tonight for holding the practice outside in the sunshine!)

 Namaste _/|\_

March Madness

Holy, moly, time flies! Where did March go? I can't believe yesterday was St. Patrick's day already.

Not much new/different to report, except that vacation is, unfortunately, over. However, a spontaneous, spur-of-the-moment trip to Whitefish for my birthday was pretty fabulous. My new powder skis have definitely got some experience this season!

Bif on Little Bunkers! Best Powder Day of the Year!

I took today off skiing--my poor little legs were like Jell-o this morning, even after a good night's sleep. Heading out again tomorrow though, to take advantage of the bliss that is mid-week skiing!

Speaking of sleep, well, it seems there's a reason I have been perpetually exhausted for the last 20 or so years. My sleep is disturbed by my irregular breathing approximately 18 times an hour! So a fancy-schmancy, definitely not sexy, machine has become my new bedfellow. Three nights in, and I'm happy to report the bone crushing fatigue that I've battled everyday for years is lifting! Nermal's not sure what to think though. I think she's spent most nights watching this new-fangled thing on her human's face and wondering what the hell the world is coming to!

Yoga teacher training is almost over! How did *that* happen?! It's all good. Practice, practice, practice. And patience. It all comes together in the end.

Kapotasana Prep

And now I must shower and prepare for a lovely birthday celebration dinner with my favourite peeps, S & L. S & I both have March birthdays (although I'm a Pisces and she's an Aires) and since we've both been uber busy lately, we're celebrating both tonight.

Sad Weekend

For a couple of reasons:
- I found out this morning that my dearest friend lost her dad. And not even a year since her mom died. It's been my own worst nightmare since I lost my dad: becoming an orphan. My heart hurts for her and her family. I wish I could give her a great big hug and tell her it'll be OK. But I can't. And that makes my heart hurt even more. So if you could send out an extra prayer tonight, I know somebody who could use it.

- It's the final weekend of my Anusara Immersion series. Our beautiful group of goddesses are gathered for one last weekend and as much fun as it was rockin' out to Micheal Franti before we tackled our practice leading up to Padmasana (Lotus pose), it was bittersweet, too. I guess what I've learned most today is that we always carry a little piece of everyone we meet and interact with, with us. And that's not a bad thing at all.

But a great big piece of good news happened today, too! My friend, C got a clear bill of health. No sign of the lymphoma that was there this time last year. So even while my heart hurts for M & her family & my own little kula, it bursts with happiness.

Bitter and sweet.

Forgetting and remembering.

Steadiness and surrender.

Contrary compliments.

This entire existence is a spanda, a pulsation, and all we can do is take it all in: the good, the bad, the easy and the difficult. And know that we are never, never alone, even when it feels like we are.

I honour the place in you where the entire Universe resides.
I honour the place in you of light, of love, of truth and of peace.
I honour the place in you, where if you are in that place in you, and I am in that place in me,
There is only One of Us.
Namaste.
_/|\_

Taking Yoga Off the Mat

One of my reading assignments for my last Immersion was Pada One of Patanjali's Yoga Sutras. I have 3 different translations (Desikachar, Stiles and Satchidananda).

I starred this one during my first teacher training and it was a good review to go back and re-read.

I.33
By cultivating attitudes of friendliness toward the happy, compassion for the unhappy, delight in the virtuous, and disregard toward the wicked, the mind-stuff retains its undisturbed calmness. (Sri Swami Satchidananda)

By cultivating attitudes of friendliness toward happiness,
compassion toward suffering,
delight toward virtue,
and equanimity toward vice,
thoughts become purified,
and the obstacles to self-knowledge are lessened.
(Mukunda Stiles)

My goal for the rest of the year is to try and maintain these attitudes both on and off the mat. Sometimes it's easier said than done, though...

Kinda Random

My weekend was amazing, but I'm still processing everything. For once, I can't think of the words. I think this may have happened once or twice before, but I can't remember when.

Friday marked the beginning of my Anusara Immersion series. Oh, well before all that, I went to my Friday morning class and almost did the splits, followed by the bird of paradise (well, my version of it--it didn't look quite like this):

Source
Coffee, Farmer's Market and Costco followed. And there may have been a stop at Superstore (for new sheets) and Urban Barn (for new duvet cover). Oh, and back up to Thursday where I had a colonoscopy (just my five year check up and all is good. The prep is worse than the actual scope.).

Back to yoga...we're a small group, all women. We clicked right away. We spent the whole weekend together learning the Tantric philosophy that Anusara is built upon. There was also anatomy. And asana practice. And laughter. And tears. More laughter. More tears. Tea. There was also tea. It was overwhelming (in a good way) and yet I can't wait to go back for more. Like Noah says, "There's always more. More harder. More dangerous. There's always more."

Oh, and there was a Don't Cry for Me, Argentina Malbec party on Saturday night. I may have been very glad that we didn't have to go upside down till very late on Sunday...

Post-script: After publishing, I realized that I was also speechless last weekend after Desiree's workshop. Apparently this has happened at least three times...

Immersed

In yoga all weekend! Last night began Immersion I (I'll be done all 3 by the first of December). So far, so good!

Oh Friday, How I Love Thee!

I've worked some crazy overtime in the past two days. Good news is that my overtime bank is now full (for extra days off later this fall) and even though I have to get the rest paid out, it will just about pay for one of my Anusara Immersions! If the tax man doesn't take it all, that is.

I didn't get to bed till 3 last night, but I set an alarm for 7:30...can't miss my Friday yoga class (followed by coffee and chit-chat)! I woke up feeling really great at 7, so I got up and am just starting to feel the lack of sleep now.

Today's class was great--we worked on shoulder and skull loop and tried some neat things with headstand and forearm balance (ooh, my shoulders are tight!!). I'm stoked about the workshop next weekend with Desiree and am loving my practice lately. Immersing myself in yoga studies, asana practice and kula (community) has enriched my life in so many ways that I have a difficult time articulating it. All I know for sure is that the path I'm on is true and I treasure each moment along the way.

When I got home this afternoon (yes, class is from 9:30-11 but I didn't get home till 2), I made plans to hike with C. and some of her peeps tomorrow. This meant I had to plan a "summit sammie". Now, I realize that we're hiking to a lake (Rawson), not climbing a peak, but still. I hike better when I know there's good food at the end! Enter the muffaletta! It's HUGE, but is going to be oh, so good! There's the olive spread (with fresh oregano from my patio), ham and capicola (spicy!), provolone & mozza, roasted red, orange & yellow peppers, and roasted zuke & aubergine (sounds so much better than eggplant, dontchya think?). I hollowed out a loaf of sourdough (my Safeway didn't have any other crusty, round loaves) and loaded 'er up! It's now squishing (that's a technical term, by the way) in the fridge.

I had some leftover veggies and remembered the tasty salad I made for Julie's potluck in the spring. Of course, I had no green onions or cilantro, so I had to go back to Safeway. The end product was definitely worth it, though!

Black bean vinagrette + roasted veg + black beans = Deliciousness!

Now, I must finish this cup of herbal tea (cranberry apple zinger, if you're wondering) and get to bed. It's gonna be an early morning!

Thursday Run

It almost didn't happen...I got chatting with my neighbour, and then it got hot out, but I bit the bullet! It wasn't far, it wasn't fast, but I don't care. I ran. And considering that I saw two elderly gentlemen in wheelchairs en route, I'm pretty damned grateful that I *can* run.

3.5 km
27:30
7.51 km/h
277 cal

Tomorrow I'm off to yoga in the morning (Dear Mat: I have missed you like you'll never know. I'll see you bright and early. I promise!) and then back on the bus heading for Red Deer. Mom's picking me up and we're going to my aunt's house for the night and then to Bonnyville for a funeral Saturday morning. It's a whirlwind trip, since I've got to be back to work on Sunday afternoon. It's hard watching my dad's big family dwindle to nothing...

Anyways, must sleep so that I can get all bendy tomorrow!

Shine Your Light

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
— Marianne Williamson (A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of a Course in Miracles)

Today's yoga class with Judy was about letting our light shine. It was about shining so brightly, from the inside out, that our hearts lifted as we bent back into the unknown. And bend, I did!

The more I study Anusara, the deeper I go--mind, body and spirit. I shone so brightly this morning, I did a drop-back from Ustrasana. I'm not sure how close I was to a drop-back from standing, but I know that I was closer than I have EVER been before. And all because I courageously opened my heart and allowed my light to shine? Really? That's all it took? It's true. Everything I need, I already have. It's in there, I just have to dust it off and let it shine.

The three A's of Anusara were all there: attitude (set the intention--shine brightly), alignment (root to rise) and then the action (trust the Divine and bend back!!). I'm continually amazed that even on a day when I'm not feeling my best (darned sinus infection and sleep deprivation), the three A's can make me as giddy as a school girl, turn my day around and leave a huge grin on my face. Who needs anything more?

So go ahead, shine your light brightly. And just see what happens.

Back to Work

*le sigh*

I've quite enjoyed my days off, even if they did fly by!

All weekend I was down at Prince's Island Park, soaking up the sun (and some rain) at the Calgary Folk Music Festival! It rained (poured, actually) on Friday night, but we stayed dry and warm in our lean-to. Here's me and my folking sister, Kim, and dad, Bill. We've been folking together for almost 10 years, and I love them to bits. Here's us in our lean-to:


And this was our view (the big screens were just off to the right and left and so we could see what was going on on the main stage):


Saturday and Sunday the sun returned and everyone rejoiced! Music! Dancing! Good food! Good friends! Old and new friends! Really, it's the best weekend of the summer, and it went by waaaaaay too quickly!

I had the day off yesterday, which was good, since I managed to get heat stroke on Sunday. Didn't teach yoga, just rested and caught up on Coronation Street.

This morning I awoke to pouring rain (so much for the forecast of 60% chance of showers this afternoon! Pouring rain before 9 a.m.? Sheesh! I wanna be a weather forecaster--the only job you can be wrong all the time and still keep your job. Oh wait, that could be my boss, too...)

Took the bus to the gym where I've been subbing for my friend, Sophie and taught for an hour. I came outside and lo and behold, the rain had stopped! I walked home (40-ish minutes) in the fresh air and I *think* I see blue sky out there now!

Off to work in a bit...maybe I'll play on my mat a bit first, though! Have a beautiful Tuesday!

Monday catch-up

There's been a lot going on:

-yoga: teaching and my own practice

-running: not nearly enough, but a great 8K run on Sunday morning before the heat hit

-family: mom and nephew came to visit. Hit up the Farmer's Market in Millarville and BBQ'd and went to see Wicked. There may also have been Stampede fireworks from a 2nd story patio (sans railing--it's still a construction site, after all) and late night noodles and bubble tea.

It's all good. =)

Tuesday Training

29:40
4.11 km
7:13 km/h
338 cal

Like Wayne Gretzky says, "You miss 100% of the shots you don't take." It's like that with running, you never regret going once you go. It's like that with yoga, I've never once regretted stepping onto my mat. It's like that with love, you can't fall if you don't take the first step.

What shot are you taking today?

Amazing Saturday

Starts out with a run:
45:22
7:33 km/h
6.02 km
488 cal

Followed by whole grain banana chocolate chip pancakes on the patio.

Grocery shop and preparation for BBQ/Epicure party I'm hosting.

Then Restorative Yoga class with my lovely friend Catherine.

And I discovered that I have abdominal muscles in there somewhere, 'cause they hurt like hell from yesterday's crazy yoga class! I love it! =)

Friday Yoga Class

Oh. My.

What fun we had this morning! I must admit, after getting home late, then waking up earlier than I would have liked, I almost didn't go to class this morning. But since I'm going to miss the next two weeks ('cause I'll be subbing for my friend, Sophie), I rolled out of bed and headed away from the craziness of downtown (the Stampede parade, complete with Wills and Kate, was this morning).

After a crazy intense warm-up, I started to get a little worried. I had hoped for a slower, less intense practice this morning. Hah! That's what I wanted, but that's not what I needed. What did I get? What I needed was a partnered practice that went:

Handstand --> Chataranga --> Rajakapotasana
We started in handstand, lowered ourselves down like in chataranga (our partner held our leg(s) while at the same time melting our hearts forward, bending our knees and backbending to the full expression once we were on the floor.

What's rajakapotasana, you ask? This is the variation we did:


Source

So much fun! My feet weren't very close to my head, but there was so much heart opening (melting) and FUN! And empowering to know that I can do that. Followed by tea at S'bucks and great conversation.

What a day. My patio awaits!

Friday Wrap-up

What a week!

I worked four days this week and put in overtime every.single.night. Anywhere from an hour to 4.25. Sheesh! I'm a little tired and bleary eyed.

Good news, my cousin is driving to the family picnic tomorrow, so instead of being up and on a bus by 0830h, I don't have to get up until then. He's picking me up at 0930h and we'll hit the road. We've been playing phone tag--I haven't actually seen him since we went skiing for his birthday on April Fool's Day. Where has this year gone already?!

With that, I'd better hit the hay. I only got one run in this week, so if I wake up early, I'd like to go for a quick one before we leave. If not, I'm taking my ball glove, a fast ball, a soft ball, a football and a volleyball. There will be activity to be had!

Before work this afternoon, I had a quick yoga practice (obviously, these are not photos of me!):

Salamba sarvangasana (shoulder stand, Mother of all asanas)


Halasana (plow pose)

Source

Sirsasana II (tripod headstand, king of all asanas)

Source

Anantasana

Source

I felt great afterwards!

Tales of Hanuman

Hanuman--The Monkey God: playfully serious, shape shifter, resourceful, your authentic self.

I don't even know how to describe how incredible the past three days have been! All I know is that I am blessed.

To have a family that loves and supports me unconditionally.

To have friends (old and new) that do the same.
(Both new friends!)

To have found the courage to open to grace, both on and off the mat.

To dance with the Divine, every time I step onto my mat. And whenever I step off.

To have teachers to guide me, support me and who share freely what their teachers have shared with them.

To have a beautiful body that is strong and true. And always allows me to be seriously playful.

What I thought was our peak pose from yesterday's backbending class (as demonstrated by Noah). It wasn't. There was MORE (More deeper. More dangerous). But good!


I think this is ardha bhekasana ardha dhanurasana (half frog half bow)!

My body is sore (but in a good way, knowing that I worked hard) and my mind and heart are full. I'm going to (with these lovely ladies, I hope) continue studying with Noah next spring in L.A.! I'm so excited!


Now, off to my mat for a restorative practice...we didn't do much of that this weekend!

Namaste. _/|\_

p.s. Kimberly--I've been practicing for almost 15 years (the last six more consistently) and teaching since last June!

Jai Hanuman!

This weekend is all about the monkey god, Hanuman. He's seriously playful. So was our hip opening, forward bending practice tonight! Serious--we got our hips really open so that we could forward bend more deeply. Playful--there was laughter, jokes, and joyful delight as we opened to grace in our practice.

We used our mats to open our calves which was fun. Virasana...not so much, but better than it's been before! And Janu sirsasana, well, it was better than it's ever been.

Now must go soak in the tub so that I'm ready for tomorrow's backbends and hand balances!

Namaste. _/|\_